Mordax (overlord_mordax) wrote in real_vamp,

Calling Out

It always pains me to see a group dead like this. This kind of group especially. Is anyone still here? Why have we all drifted away? Were we finally beaten and shamed into submission by trolls, and pop-culture, doubt and fashion and apathy?

Maybe some people found that they’d been pretending all along- that this was just a coat they put on as they grew into their true selves, and they shed it for some other identity.

Maybe some people found that they had become so comfortable with themselves, with the strengths and drawbacks of being what we are that they didn’t think they needed the kind of community a group like this offers.

Maybe some people just saw the group dwindle; the young pretenders finding themselves, the old hands grown too cynical to teach, and thought, ‘what’s the point?‘ and looked elsewhere for answers and companionship.

And maybe the young ones, just coming into themselves saw an empty, desolate community, and just didn’t bother. Soldiered on in confusion as they had before, solitary.

I sit here feeling lonely, and a little sad. There are things I’d like to say; amusing anecdotes about the daily challenges of our state of being, questions for those older and more experienced than I, some minor wisdom gleaned from what experiences I have amassed. But I wonder is it worth it?

Does anyone care anymore about psi or blood, shades and sunburns, feeding and funny looks?

I know you’re out there. I know the spark hasn’t just gone away. This is real, this is true. Yes, there will always be pretenders, and scorn, and infighting. But at the end of the day I think suffering all that is worth it, to be part of something larger than just ourselves, wandering adrift through the night.
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